The Definitive List of the 12 Best Christmas Recordings of All Time

It’s officially December which means, by my rules, it’s offically completely fine to listen to Christmas music non-stop for the next twenty-five days. Sadly, the season often finds me drearily pushing my shopping cart down the cereal aisle to the tune of a total bummer rendition of The Little Drummer Boy, or a horrifically shrill cover of Santa Baby, or, for whatever bizarre reason, a cover of Leonard Cohen’s decidedly not-a-Christmas-song, Hallelujah. There is no need for this. Not when there are so many great Christmas recordings to choose from. There are entire albums of great Christmas songs.

I like to make Christmas playlists. I’ve been doing it since CD burners were first a thing that people had in their homes. I’m saying this so you know I am completely qualified to curate this list of the twelve best Christmas recordings of all time. There are great songs that are not on this list (see my Spotify Christmas playlist for details), but these songs are the best of the best.

Here is your essential Christmas jams list, in no particular order.

Purple Snowflakes - Marvin Gaye

This is an underrated Christmas song because it was actually unreleased until 1992, even though it was recorded in 1964. A non-Christmas version was released instead at the time (Pretty Little Baby), but I am really glad the Christmas version was finally released. It’s a stunner, managing to be festive while also being lush, atmospheric, and sexy. This song makes me want to curl up by a fire.

Jingle Bells - Smokey Robinson & the Miracles

This version of Jingle Bells narrowly edged out Ella Fitzgerald’s (which I love specifically because in that version the backup singers chorus “I’m just nuts about bells”). But I love all things Smokey Robinson, and the Miracles just sound like they’re having a really great time in the background of this one (“Wheeee!”). It’s slow, but still really peppy and I can’t listen to it without smiling. This song makes me want to buy a bunch of ridiculous nonsense to cram into stockings.

Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) - Darlene Love

I mean, obviously. This is one of the best recordings of all time. Period. Everytime I hear a cover of it I think, “How dare you?” (I am looking directly at you, Bono). Much like Christmas itself, this song is a whole event. It makes me so happy that I forget it’s actually a super sad song. In general, songs about being lonely at Christmas are great. This song makes me want to splurge on top shelf spirits and make my own cocktail syrups.

Last Christmas - Wham!

Speaking of songs about being lonely at Christmas. I know this is a controversial choice because people seem to hate this song, which is weird because this song is fantastic. It’s an angsty Christmas bop! And I don’t want to hear ANY covers of it (You tried, Carly Rae. We love you, but you biffed it. I’m sorry). This song makes me want to crash a giant office Christmas party and grab the karaoke mic.

(Everybody’s Waitin’ For) The Man With the Bag - Kay Starr

Yassssss. There are a lot of classic big band Christmas recordings, but you can keep the whole Rat Pack and leave me with my girl Kay Starr. This song is so good that it makes me forget that Santa is not, in fact, real, and won’t be coming to grant my wishes. In general, this song is great because of the complicated rhyming and the way it absolutely doesn’t quit. This song makes me want to make gingerbread cookies and give them silly faces.

Step Into Christmas - Elton John

This song is amazing and I won’t hear otherwise. First of all, it’s a solid earworm that stays with me for the entire holiday season and beyond, but I never mind it. Secondly, it opens with Elton welcoming us to his Christmas song, which is weird and good. I want Elton John to perform this at my funeral. This song makes me want to buy a tree way earlier than I should.

The Bells of St. Mary’s - Bob B. Soxx & The Blue Jeans

I think to truly appreciate how fucking awesome this recording is, you need to listen to literally any other version of The Bells of St.Mary’s. It’s usually a slog. THIS one on the other hand is a party and a church service all in one. Mr. Soxx hits some notes. And it has that Spect*r wall-of-sound thing happening behind it. It’s a whole experience. I just let this one wash over me like a wave of egg nog. This song makes me want to drive around looking at Christmas lights.

Winter Wonderland - Aretha Franklin

Aretha sounds so damn cute on this track. There are a lot of versions of this song, but this is my favourite. It really sells the romance, and you kind of can’t help at least bobbing your head to it. This song makes me want to buy new mittens and walk through a snowy park.

Old Toy Trains - Roger Miller

Heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time? It’s really not a sad song at all, but it gets me feeling things every time. It’s just really, really sweet. Of all the Christmas songs that are directly addressing children, this one is the best. It captures the magic of Christmas, and the excitement of Christmas Eve, but it’s also basically a lullaby. I love it. This song makes me want to hug my kids and also my dad.

A Holly Jolly Christmas - Burl Ives

The party has arrived. No one is immune to this one. Come on. Burl is commanding you to have a holly jolly Christmas. It’s the best time of the year! You can’t resist! I hear this song and I’m like, “Yes, sir!” Also, he wants you to kiss a random person under the mistletoe on his behalf! Weird! This song makes me want to buy more cute wrapping paper, even though I have plenty of wrapping paper and really need to stop.

Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow! - Doris Day

This is a sex jam. Doris Day takes one of the most recorded Christmas songs and turns it into a total babymaker. I think she might actually be hypnotizing the listener. This song makes me want to fuck.

All I Want for Christmas is You - Mariah Carey

I left this one until last just to stress you out. Of course it’s on the list. It’s the absolute best. Even if this song was the only one Mariah ever wrote and recorded ever, she would still be one of the most important pop stars of all time. Again, I don’t know why anyone attempts to cover this one. You can’t improve on it. Stop trying. This song makes me want to buy festive scented candles with vague names like ‘Merry & Bright’ and ‘In the Bleak Midwinter’.

So there you have it. Make a list of these twelve songs, pad it out with some tracks from The Ventures’ Christmas Album and some A Charlie Brown Christmas selections and you’ve got yourself a perfect playlist to take you right through the holidays.